SHUTDOWN ZINE #1.5

soo.thousands and thousands of ringgit on an education only to find no one willing to give you a job and a chance.As a Civil Engineering graduate, I can relate to the suffocating, depressing, never-ending job searches that make you question every choice you’ve ever made – especially choosing to go to college in the first place ,eventho these courses actually had a highly demand for offering a job in Sabah. At a time in your life when the college loan bills start pouring in, your home is in limbo, your relationships and friendships are askew, and your excitement to get your life “started” is at its peak, there really is nothing more crushing. It takes patience, faith, and hard work to press on.To have to accept an unrelated job where you are treated like shit and your high-school-grad co-workers are paid the same as you. Or to work in an environment where everyone is miserable and work sucks out your will to go on.i keep telling my self to "Remembering what you’ve accomplished thus far, reminding yourself of how young you are, and realizing that nothing is permanent – “this too shall pass” – is essential for keeping a positive, focused, and balanced outlook. Not to mention dealing with stress and anxiety." to hell with that.

im not a political person,im a well-being people who trust about equality.During my job hunting,there's a lot of thing i learned,about people,reality,the country and political.I keep telling myself that I would just not write anything about these silly Malaysian, but I just can't help myself unfortunately so now you will be graced with my view on these moronic little turds.I hear people every day complaining about the government. They say things such as "oh the government doesn't listen", "the government is corrupt", and "the government needs to go away". While I agree with all of those things, I do not see how anyone can truly believe that "we the people" will ever revolt against the government and make things right in this country.

If you are anything like me, you probably watch the news and see the corrupt news stations taking their sides in the political arena.we have BULETIN UTAMA on TV3 and then of course all of the other stations that have political and money ties to whichever party they like. Many of you think the news is really true and the news is being reported in a fair manner. Well, if you believe that you had best go and research a little because you are a fool if you think that way. Look who owns these news stations, see who pays them. Maybe then you will get the point.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is because so many people want the government to go to hell but nobody has the balls to stand up and make it happen. Oh sure, you can go on youtube or maybe a blog and see people who say they are going to fight the government and fix things but for the most part, those people are all talk and what I like to call "couch patriots". They could never do anything worth while and all they know how to do is talk a lot. We then have the morons who go "insane" and shoot up buildings and people. Those idiots thought they were doing something good only to find out that they are alone and they look like complete douche bags. Then of course once they get killed by the police, they are called terrorists (which they are) or they are said to have had mental problems (which they do). So as you can see, none of those things are going to work.

What about the millions of people who do nothing but work, pay their taxes (get raped by the government) and sit glued to their televisions to watch "Akademi fantasia"? These are the people who have been programmed by the elite to shut up and comply.They are good people but they have just given up, given in and they comply with the machine. This is sad.How exactly do people who hate the tyrannical government expect any changes to be made when most Sabahan are happy as long as they have a beer and "pusas"? How do you rally enough people (and I mean millions) to actually stand up and say NO MORE! ?As you can see, it is not something that will ever happen. Sure, we will continue to see lone gunman and small groups causing trouble now and then but there will never be a mass uprising to show the government that we are sick of them.I know it's sad and I know how upset many of you are who understand that the government machine will never die. It will steam roll us all until we are dead and then it will steam roll your children and their children too. It will continue to take all of our money in the way of higher taxes and it will continue to tear the Malaysia esspecially SABAH/BORNEO into bits by taking away more of our rights just because they know they can and they know that nobody in this country (on any kind of large scale) will ever do anything about it.Why more people don't understand this is truly beyond me and it really is quite sad. So when you hear someone say that we need to "rise up against the government",u can just turn around and walk away and said there is no chance of that ever happening because people are lazy, dumb, foolish and just plain blind.

hmm

…and nothing really special or ground-breaking but I’ve been thinking about this a lot, so you can just scroll through. It’s more to put my thoughts into words. I’ve been thinking much about what I am trying to do in college. Everyone says it’s the time of “experimentation” and “finding yourself.” And while yes, I have friends who have said that they are doing things very unlike their previous selves and while, yes, I too am taking on roles that I might not have been before, it’s not exactly just “finding yourself.”

It’s more about creating yourself, as some quote whose author I can’t exactly remember. And, it’s about trying to be the best version of yourself. While that sounds like something a teacher would preach, it’s true. In college, people want to prove that they are finally out of their awkward stage and ready to transition into the most balanced people they can be. We want to be both beautiful and smart, and while we want that all along, it’s the first time that we aren’t 100% labeled and the first time that we can take charge, whether it be over our bodies or out minds.

But, it’s hard. It means having both the motivation and dedication to be so. It means creating a plan - which is not super hard - and following it - which is. It’s using this time wisely; it’s maximizing every minute. It’s also coming to terms that we might not be 100% out of our awkward stage. People expect it to be like a typical teenage movie; college is not a switch in which the awkward stage just turns “off.” But, college is all about taking what you have and trying your best despite obstacles.

Mine is to be balanced person I can be.

people need help.

So, I haven't been writing here much lately. Actually, it's been two month since I wrote anything at all. I'd write a post about it except I didn't take any pictures, and just words seems like it would be boring, i think.But most of the reasons I haven't been writing here lately are the same reasons I haven't been writing all that much in the last several months: writers block, not being able to find topics that really catch my fancy, trying to focus on things not related to computers

Today all of these things came together and I have had this realization and it is too beautiful and too perfect to explain properly.This shits blows my mind.This assumes that the Third World shit ‘needs’ help,This family is in a position to supply this help ,They’re also in a position to ‘inspire’ people ,This family — judging by what you wrote — ‘used’ these people they’re ‘helping’ as one would objects, to feel better about themselves.I’ll just address this point by point.Yes, people in the Third World need help. Just like people in the First World and what’s left of the Second. People everywhere need help, regardless of their country. And regardless of our nationality we’re all one global humanity, so a family of humans traveling the world helping out other humans in need, regardless of their country, is a beautiful thing.Any family or person willing to give of themselves and their time is capable of helping other humans.Selling all your things to go around the world committing good acts is something many would find inspirational. It could inspire people, to you know, be less materialistic and more giving. How is this bad in anyway?but,who give a fuck anyway?“Used” them like objects to feel better about themselves? Who the fuck makes a huge sacrifice and gives up their lives to go use people to feel better about themselves? You can feel better about yourself by smoking a joint and masturbating and save yourself the effort. Why shouldn’t you feel good about yourself if you’ve done good for other people? I guess everyone who’s ever done anything for anyone has that action invalidated if they felt good about it after?i dont know.but one thing for sure,i bet,no one give a fcuk.APA LANCAU.

there is no way in hell I would want to be a kid today

I am about to turn 24. No I am not upset. I think of it as an accomplishment. I am glad I came up in the time that I did. The time before computers and video games and full blown cable. Here a few differences:

-fuck Then

I stayed out and played all day, kickball, trail tag, and play wrestling

My mother tore my ass up when I got out of line

I would be paddled by the teacher if I acted up in school

I could watch MTV when they actually played music videos

I had a virgin Barbie doll

I would go skating the entire weekend and would not have to worry about a pervert

I would have dozens and dozens of cassette tapes of songs

-fuck Now

Kids will have to be fork lifted from the couch after playing video games all day

Parents count now. Yet nothing happens to the kid when they reach 10. They just count again .

If a teacher paddles a kid now they are labeled a pedophile and fired

You can not find a music video on MTV anymore. Only stupid reality shows

We have crackhead, homeless and prostitute Barbee now

Kids wont skate they have Wii now and they can pretend to skate

Kids have the Ipod now. No need of cassette tapes. Thank you Itunes

The childhood I had was great. Today is different. Some parents will just stay on welfare and allow the streets and the school to raise their kids. So I am glad I will be 24 and older because there is no way in hell I would want to be a kid today.

animal,some of them are smarter(literally) than some humans

Animals Have Rights?Well.why shouldn't they? They feel pain, they suffer and some of them are smarter(literally) than some humans. As if that wasn't enough, killing and torturing them is just not necessary. But please...if anyone has some good excuses as to why we can and should torture, torment, kill, slaughter, dismember, humiliate, disrespect, destroy, annihilate and disembowel non-human animals I would love to hear the reason.

teach people, don’t criticize them.

These days even teachers are scared to say anything that might be deemed "politically incorrect". Handicapped people are no longer handicapped, but are physically or mentally impaired. Prisoners are no longer prisoners, but are freedom inclined.Pass weekend we're organizing a show/gig (Jeritan Hari Pekerja #3) at Lohan Rest House,Ranau.Well here's the point,are we doing a bad thing? sincerely sorry to our brothers ''Soccer Punch'' for the unnecessary accusement at their school SMK Kundasang.

Can Someone Explain This to me?Why are humans still being allowed to procreate and not being forcefully spayed and neutered like the filth that they are? There are almost 7 billion humans on Earth and we're leaving entire species and the planet bleeding and on its knees. Isn't it ironic that people such as myself; who understand and vow never to have kids are exactly the kind of people that SHOULD be having kids because we would be teaching them the path to a peaceful and sustainable future where we are part of the planet's community instead of being it's enemy? Meanwhile 99% of humans are breeding without a second thought; thinking they are doing the world and their inferior spawn a favor, when it's actually the worst case of narcissistic selfishness EVER!

Dear Teacher,your job, when designing features, is to make them powerful, usable, and understandable. Not to cater to those people too lazy to think. your job is to make things intuitive. But intuition still requires an individual to want to understand something. It requires an attempt to understand. It requires thought, even subconsciously. We have little power over people’s desire to succeed. So teach people, don’t criticize them.

Most of kids are not good in academics, practically and other things. It doesn't mean that they are useless. I really don't feel that we are like a black spot in this society. I believe that things doesn't end here. What really matters a lot is our ability to deal, deal with the things which are coming to us.We too can make a lot of difference. We should be open-minded. An open minded individual may have limited knowledge or technical know how but is open to embrace and munch on as much as life has

And don’t misunderstand. Keep things simple. But simple doesn’t mean stupid. Simple doesn’t mean boring. And simple certainly doesn’t mean standard. It means you can figure it out, even if it takes a minimal amount of thinking.What’s interesting is that making something simple is significantly more difficult than making it complicated. Simple takes thought. It takes work, and lots of it. Celebrate when users succeed, and don’t patronize them for wanting or needing help.

And here’s the real truth: If you’re dumbing down your student or job because you think people won’t ‘get it,’ you’re hurting the experience of those who are more comfortable in your life. If you don’t provide hints and cues in your job, you’re intimidating and hurting the experience for people who aren’t as comfortable. Either way, you’re keeping people from learning, and that’s just uncool.

Dear Teacher,Teach, Don’t Ignore.

Piss Off!

Who cares about debt, corporations don't pay their debts, the Govt. doesn't pay their debts, why should you pay your debts? They can't punish us all, just rack up as much debt as you can and don't pay a dime, they can't do shit to you. Enough is enough. They have made getting ahead in this country so hard that it's nearly impossible. It's a good ol' boy system of thieves and corrupt scum. Everyone is so obsessed with paying off debt. Why? You never truly get out of owing someone. For example, if you pay off your house, you still have to pay our corrupt Government property taxes and other bullshit fees like insurance and housing association. If you pay off your car, you still owe registration and still get tickets and other garbage. Other bills are recurring, like cable, taxes, cellphone, utilities. Our entire system is based on economical slavery and it's destroying the world, exterminating entire species' of animals and producing no progress for humanity as a whole. So like I said, they can't do anything to you if you don't pay, so fuck'em!im seriously piss off with goverment.

Think

Sometimes things happen in life that make you step back, i take a deep breath, and try to regain a right perspective. I feel like I’ve had one of those weekends. So I decided that instead of trying to churn out mindless posts for the sake of just getting something on this blog every day that I would rather not waste my time. Instead, I’m taking a week off of blogging to spend some time thinking and re-evaluating plus its my final exam week. Hopefully I’ll be back next week refreshed and with something of value to share.I hope that you have a refreshing week as well.

LITTLE VANILLA with a BIG Talent.

That's a record i would like to know more about,When i first heard they song,my mind set ,i was intrigued. “What is this?” i thought to myself. After i put the thumbdrive on my laptop,it didn’t take long to figure out. LITLLE VANILLA : DREAM , just like the package says, “A good magically song trapped inside!”

Still don’t get it? Let’s start with the story behind these two girls. This group of two girls with a nice vocal i have to say.

Vocal :shella

Guitar And Vocal : Bell

mostly a songs it is an a acoustic version. In Trying of a new kind of way to express their experience i guess.and i bet u would love it.The Music is, i loved listening to the music. They kind of reminded me of something you’d see from back way past. DREAM, on the other hand, is a love song. I am sure this will make kids everywhere giggle and hum along to the tunes.

track will be upload soon.

you're not hardcore,unless you live hardcore

man,!i cant stop laughing until the end of the story.school of rock rules!boooya!

just sharing my thought

Thanx For Reading

I had a conversation/sharing thought with two of my best cousin thru Facebook (bukan Ray / Nazril Herol ),so why not if i share my thought with all of you people out there.

Who says angels are found in heaven only? I have a bunch of angels on earth who are taking care of me. I am really blessed with some special friends who have always been on my side through thick and thin. I might be the richest man on this planet when it comes to friendship, and that is one treasure that is never going to dry up.

life?That is what these people are trying to figure out. People spend more time lamenting about their problems rather than focusing on the purpose of their own existence on this planet. Many people whine about their life and they feel that their life is the most unfair life. But they forget the fact that there are many people in this world in situations that are worse compare to their own situation.what im trying to say is. ''bersyukur'' thankful what we have now.

i would love to change the past, but fukk off.that’s not in my hands and there is no reason for me to regret about things I have already done. I never knew how strong I was, I bet most people in my place would have been broken by now. I have matured a lot in these several years, and I have more control on my emotions.I think that I have more respect for people now, especially women (My MOM). Most enduring and forgiving living being on this planet. Man should have self-respect, not ego...because looks, strength and wealth will never be there forever,but 1 thing for sure,we do need money to survive and complete our needs. I could say a lot, but I will just say that I have grown into a more sensitive person. I have no problem in expressing my emotions or feelings, I have learnt that holding back would do no good.

Anyways I am sure you guys got my point, I stopped wishing on this day.from now on I am not going to do that,what im going to do is,show some effort to move forward.make my big family proud. i wish i could.

im sharing my thought. :)

im talking about the scene.

This is not all about the fashion,tatoo,piercing,fliers and shirt u wear,it's always about the music, the message, the passion! If one element went missing, I would not call it music. Thanks to it all, we feel we belong to the scene.there's no boundaries exist between the musicians and the audience, where anybody can grab the mic and, together with, scream out the words that they agree with. It is the idea that inspired to take action. im not looking for "fans" in the traditional rock'n'roll meaning. Through the music, we all just want to attract people who share our approach and see that there is more to it all than just sounds.

the scene is not only about music but also about the message that stimulates critical thinking. we do not feel we are the right people to tackle complex topics related to world affairs. the lyrics centre around "not-so-serious politcs", the issue of interpersonal relations, everyday decisions and their consequences. i believe that it is our decisions which we make each and every day that mean more to the world than major politics. It's all about having a positive outlook on life and treating people and the environment with respect.

fast forward to the DIY band; we believe in the do-it-yourself approach. everything connected with this band is the fruit of the work and the courtesy and help of our friends. always associated the passion and actions which come from individual initiatives, people connected to the scene and not with big business. fast forward it's the contribution to the scene.

what the hell is wrong with people PART 9348324.2

sometime i have to admit that HUMAN ARE ASSHOLE!people take advantage of others when disasters hit other. I think that has to be the most terrible thing a person can do. I have heard this time and time again about how some assholes think its a great idea to run a fake charity to raise money to line their own pokets. First of all, do these assholes actually believe that they are going to get away with this anymore? If they do they are seriously stupid. After all of the crap that has happened over the last 10 years, police are just looking for you assholes who do this kind of crap.What in the hell is wrong with people? It just makes me wanna throw up to think that there are such massive assholes out there who dont give a damn about anything but themselves. But then again, I guess thats a part of being human and humans are assholes.

''my mistake.How I responded was innappropriate. I'll check myself before responding so quickly."

so here's my goal this month (heck, let's bring it to the end of the year) is to stop saying i'm sorry. just entirely. i can work it back into my speech when i really mean it, but, in the meantime, use other words. when i really did make a mistake or do something in anger i can say, "That was my mistake. i'll try to be more aware in the future." Or "how i responded was innappropriate. Iill check myself before responding so quickly.".i'm sick of saying i'm sorry. i apologize when someone else bumps into me, even if i wasn't even moving. i apologize for things that i am not really sorry for. every time that i apologize, i take away some of the power and truth from the times i am really and truly sorry for a mistake i have made or feel empathy for a situation someone is in. every time i apologize in this way, i am telling a lie.

i will be bold, sure of myself, and clear in my language. but i will not be sorry.

myspace turn into facebook=myface!

i use to love myspace before.but now i just hate the changes!i just want it to go back to how it use to be when u can add any layout u want without havein to go threw so much crap with betta and stuff. its to much work.dear TOM is no longer Myspace it's now YourSpace and can only be personalized the way ..You want it.The new myspace is crap. Cut the trying to be hip bullshit, with wow awseome your profile is cool or what ever. It is all mismatched. One thick column one thin, cant see background, scroll bar colours. It has been foisted on everyone whether they like it or not. Just an other example of you know best. In this case so way off the mark. the new version is like facebook, bland,and plus the site is too slow.Anyone trying to use the site can expect a lot of messages such as “Server Too Busy,” “Sorry! an unexpected error has occurred. this error has been forwarded to MySpace’s technical group,” and so on. !fuck off.

sorry to say,even people with two-thirds of a brain can figure out that myspace now is look ugly and stupid,as soon as they log into the site for the first time.

bye TOM

WTF = What The Facebook!

So, facebook where has it wronged me? Well we didn’t start out on the best of terms, people defected to Facebook and before I knew it I was talking to myself..We started out alright Facebook and me it quickly became the site which seemed to be filled with people I went to school with. So I spent many a night poring through other people’s profiles seeing what they had gotten up to.These days I have every application blocked, from bejewelled, to farmville, pet shop to mafia wars even horoscopes. If it clutters up my feed with someone else telling me they lost a fucking goat and would I like it, I press block. So my feed has been streamlined but what of everything else?Well in truth I have discovered that I don’t really talk to that many people bar a handful. There are a lot of people who are friends on the site that I didn’t even know. And as it seems to be a requirement that you add everyone from school your hands are tied. What makes it worse is that now with the ‘mutual friends’ feature everyone can see when you aren’t friends with that person anymore. Talk about forcing your hand.Heres the thing. It is all bollocks. I don’t believe half of them. I do not believe that their lives are as perfect as they want to argue. I don’t believe that anyone who spends their whole lives trying to convince me how awesome their lot is can really be that happy. and plus there's some people who argue and blame each other on the their wall,spaming,swearing and act to be cool,man,you guys ruin the wall.it's swearing is really necessary?Anyone else think they doth protest too much?Now I have dillied and dallied about deleting people or just getting rid of the whole thing.

fakebook!

fresh meat!

Here we go,For one moment in my life, its good to feel really fresh when you woke up every morning knowing that you had enough sleep, life is good, everything seems to went well, well im not talking about my project or assignment at least.

Its been the second day which i thought, "hey, why not do something different today? something which you could enjoy doing it all by yourself, not with family nor friends." In fact, theres one time you will feel like you are all alone, eventhough you know next to you theres a person. It just a feelings where suddenly all your thoughts were playing around, imagining what if life would be different few years back, what if i didnt do all the things i have done, would my life would be better or worst?.

Then i feels like, "hey, why do i always doing and being the the same way? what have my life become?", on a second thought, i do feels like my life is kinda hook on something, its like i need to do this 'thing' eventhough theres nothing i get by doing it, or even nothing wrong if i didnt do it. Why was that? was that what they call as feeling guilty to myself? Its not like im not being myself, or im trying to be others, its only me trying to be better, which i must say its hard and at the same time rewarding!. I should have known that for some reasons, being in a comfort zone is not always work out, i should have done something more risky in return of something far more greater.

-_-

thanks facebook

To the credits of social network, I managed to find many long lost friends whom I met before I even hit puberty. It's not surprised to see them married with kids and with a happy family. Looking at their pictures that I realized how much people aged after childbirth. So much for a happy family.

It's not a race that I want to participate. Still, I hope to reach my end of stop some days.

keep the good people around

I think I've reached a point in my life where I only want to keep the good people around.I know I'm not the only one who has put up with a lot of bullshit in the past from people that considered themselves friends. After a while, it starts to wear on you. You begin wondering why you keep letting these people stick around

On another note, I believe in forgiveness - wholeheartedly. I believe that everyone screws up every now & then, and nobody is perfect. However, when someone keeps screwing up in the same ways and begins to expect your forgiveness, the scales become tipped. It gets all thrown out of whack, and you end up being the schmuck that somebody is walking all over. That ain't friendship, folk

WORST PART!

I've always wondered how does that happen? How can you not notice that you and your other half or, in my case "friends", just started to develop different interests, life styles and mentalities?!Recently I found out how it happens. It starts when you finish high school. The whole "gang", in which you were an essential member, just separated. Some went to different college or universities in different parts of the country and the less fortunate part just reached their education limit and got married.

You get into a university where you know no one. Just like everyone you get all kinds of assignments and you have to do them with a bunch of your classmates. If you're lucky, you'll get stuck with people you actually like and get along with and them you just become friends. The more time you spend together, the more you realize how much you have in common and how close you become until you're even more than BROTHERS. At this point you think that you'd think that you'd stay friends no matter what happens and no matter how far life takes you.

Then it starts to happen. Whenever you get together, you come back with a sense of disappointment. Everything you used to have in common is just slipping away. You are starting to develop interests that seem so irrelevant to them.The worst part is,you don't tell any of that to your friends because they'll just think you're crazy or wasting your time. And when you tell some of them about it, at the end they just give that little nod and an "ummm" and then they start talking about "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus".